Things we won't be drinking soon

From Yahoo News:

New festive sodas knock the stuffing out of Christmas dinner

Thu Nov 17, 2:23 PM ET

Forget slaving over a hot stove, fishing out the giblets and peeling the veggies -- this year's Christmas Dinner is coming out of a soda bottle.

It might sound like a bizarre brew plucked from the pages of Harry Potter or Charlie and the Chocolate Factory, but a Seattle-based firm has a new line of artificially flavored festive drinks in time for US Thanksgiving and Christmas.

Topping the menu is a delicate smoked salmon pate drink, preparing the palate for sodas flavored with turkey and gravy or a dull green liquid masquerading as brussels sprouts.

On the side, try a sip of wild herb stuffing or broccoli casserole garnished with cranberry sauce, then wash it down with dessert -- pumpkin or Pecan pie soda.

Jones Soda Company is known for its unorthodox flavors, and markets its products as "good old soda, with a twist."

This festive season, for the third year running the small independent firm has shipped a limited edition two-box set of five festive sodas to selected stores across the United States.

"We have been keeping it in limited amounts, we sure as hell don't want it sitting around the warehouse for us to drink, in like May!" said Diana Turner, Jones Soda marketing associate.

"The worst one is the brussels sprouts, its horrible, its awful... sadly it does kind of taste like buttery little sprouts in a bottle," Turner said.

"I don't like those in real life... in soda form it makes it just a little bit more weird."

"The smoked salmon is, strangely, very fishy... it is true to what it says it is, it's got the smoky kind of grilled taste to it," Turner said.

Each bottle is distinct, and a good approximation of the festive fare it is supposed to represent, though definitely an acquired taste, especially as the carbonated fizz takes a bit of getting used to.

While the taste might be a challenge, those watching their waists will be please to know that each drink is devoid of fat, carbohydrates and calories.

I'll have a bottle of gravy, and a chaser of Brussels sprouts
- no, make that smoked salmon -
oh the hell with it, where is the bottle of Cheetos?